Four British Mysteries by Thomas Brown

Author:Thomas Brown [Brown, Thomas & Davies, David Stuart & Dudley, Nikki & Spedding, Sally]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Sparkling Books Limited
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

34 The Nose Bleed

I run all the way back to the Mansen house, doubled over with breathlessness and sickness by the time I arrive. Crouching in the middle of the road for several minutes, I gasp and suck in air, not concerned if a car were to speed around the corner and bulldoze me into the asphalt.

My bag feels like it’s swelling with rocks but I haven’t been able to let go of it. I don’t want to lose the evidence or let my past escape from my memory ever again. I want to be able to say I have knowledge of something, even if it’s something bad.

Mum, it’s time to get the past back. It’s time for me to realise you can’t help anymore.

I think about going back to the house but my feet don’t want to go that way. They walk down the middle of the road, slowly and even leisurely, until I reach the part where the ascending road begins to roll downhill again. I reach my hands into the air and begin saying ’Michael’, louder and louder until I am screaming and sobbing.

I am sobbing heavily when the figure appears out of the darkness. He presses me against him like he wants to seep into my body, trying to calm my moaning. His familiar smell wraps around me like his embrace and I run through several memories in my mind of a time when we were happier, when we didn’t stand on two opposite ends of a scale that were never level.

“Oh Alice…” He coos and kisses my forehead. “Are you okay?” he asks and I wonder why I have been running away from him for so long. He does love me. He didn’t mean to disappoint me by deserting us. I can tell by his digging fingernails that he is sorry.

“I’m not okay”, I snort, burying myself into his clump of curls. I feel like I am reacquainting with myself, his hair so similar to mine, his bony nose the mirror of my own. I’m returning to the life I thought I lost and it is easier than I imagined. I can talk to him. I can act human. There is hope for me.

“Whatever it is, I’ll help you”, Michael promises, holding my face between his hands like people do when they are being earnest. I rest my forehead against his, reminding myself of his clammy blemished skin. “I love you Alice, I’m so sorry about everything. I won’t let you down again”.

For some unknown reason, I believe him. I have been trying to escape him for weeks but hearing his voice now, it is as strong and honest as a piece of steel. I need him anyway. I can’t deal with these new revelations alone.

“Will you tell me the truth, Michael?”

“I will if I can”. He stares into my eyes, not shaken by the increasingly cold wind thrashing all around us. I feel like we are in a bubble that nothing can touch, everything is frozen except the two of us.

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